After a couple of weeks chatting on a popular dating platform, they scheduled a date at a local coffee shop. They had so much fun sipping lattes that they decided to walk along the beach to get to know each other better. Tony was thrilled that Rick shared his interests in musical theater, soccer, and funny cat videos. They communicated well with each other, and the chemistry between them was electric.
Tony thanked Rick for a wonderful time, and then Rick asked him if he wanted to come home with him, continue the date there, and perhaps spend the night. Tony hesitated, feeling torn between his logical mind and the stirring in his pants. Having sex right away defines your relationship before a foundation of trust, emotional connection, and effort has been established. In other words, that short-term romp makes it difficult to sustain a long-term relationship. When conflicts arise as they inevitably will! This means you weed out flaky individuals who are just in it for the sex and focus on mature men truly interested in cultivating a relationship.
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While there certainly are many long-term relationships that started off as one-night stands, the prognosis tends to be stronger when intimacy comes after a strong friendship and bond has been created. Tony plopped onto his bed that night after coming home from a whirlwind first date with cutie Brett. But how should he proceed? Should he call Brett the next day, or should he hold off for a few days to a week?
But he also wanted him to know how much he enjoyed the experience. Should he call right away or build anticipation by waiting?
Why play games? If you like the guy you met, call him within the next day or so. Let him know how much you enjoyed meeting him and that you would love the opportunity to get together again. I advocate being direct, assertive, and taking charge of your dating life. So go for it. Develop the mantra: No more missed opportunities! Anticipating the moment when they said goodbye, Tony squirmed in his seat and wondered what to say when the guy asked him out again.
It would be so easy to say yes to the invitation and then never contact him again. Man up! We need to start treating each other better in the gay community. Our actions have consequences on the feelings of the people with whom we interact, and dating makes people feel vulnerable and crazy enough as it is.
Or maybe you only felt a friendship vibe. We strongly recommend you set up a high-quality VPN on your phone before going to protect your privacy, to remain anonymous and to keep access to your favorite websites and apps. Better safe than sorry! Using apps like Scruff, Grindr and Hornet is your way to tap into the gay scene of wherever you are and find secret gay bars, underground parties, and other events.
As a word of warning, if you are traveling somewhere where LGBT rights are not great, make sure you get a secure VPN on your phone to protect your privacy and, in some places, unblock these apps. Elevating the game is Taimi, a newcomer designed for gay men seeking real connections. We also love that Taimi is focussed on the security and safety of its users with special verification and authentication systems to keep fake accounts out.
There is nothing worse than a professional catfish right? And there is also the possibility of creating groups where users can launch discussions, organize events, cooperate and collaborate with NGOs. This is the social network aspect and we are obsessed with it. There is also a collaboration with the Trevor Project meaning users can contact Trevor immediately from their profiles and the possibility of making video calls, meaning Taimi is one of the best gay apps currently out there!
So get downloading now to form quality connections, stay safe and share without being judged! As you might guess from the name, Scruff is the slightly rough-around-the-edges version of Grindr, developed for those guys who like a little, well, scruff!
The users tend to be that bit more masc and a little older than on Grindr, although with its growing popularity there are plenty to choose from. You can scroll for nearby and around the world, so could always set up a meet-up in your destination in advance. While there are a lot of similarities between Hornet and Grindr, the newer Hornet works much more smoothly, with less of the irritating ads that pop up on Grindr to get in between you and your new piece of eye candy. What makes Hornet so great for gay travelers are the community features that help users network beyond dating.
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It started in Berlin and has now spread around the world and, while heavy on the hook-ups, also enables users to find friends, dates or learn more about LGBT issues. It aims to be a safe and friendly environment where you can live your queer life to the fullest.
The app is free and it just takes creating a quick profile to get you in touch with tonnes of guys all over the world. Wait, what? This is the largest gay social network in the world? Well, it was developed in China and the majority of its 27 million users are there. Internet censorship is rife in China and Blued is a way of getting around the banning of sites like Grindr. Its founder is a former policeman and committed to LGBT rights and we love that the network is now in partnership with Hornet.
Although it might have been set up as a Grindr for straight people, there are now lots of gays using it; just set your preferences and enjoy the wealth of choice there.
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